Monday, February 23, 2015
Today, it applies to running.
Let's get real here on this blog post. For a few moments, if you will allow me, I am not going to sugar coat, pretend or fluff up the words. I'm going to be raw and real. (I'd like to say I am that way all the time, but probably I fluff up the words at times to try to encourage myself as much as my readers).
I feel like quitting. The weather is bad, I've battled some health issues, and I have lost a lot of ground, which leaves me feeling really discouraged lately at the end of my runs. I am far from making the mark of what I wanted to accomplish in my spring races and to be quite honest, I have felt like quitting the last few days. Today, my treadmill (or "dread"mill, as I prefer to call it) run was absolutely horrible. I felt like a turtle, and when I hit a couple of miles into it and needed to slow down because I knew my heart rate was too high, I thought "Man, this is trouble." Not trouble because of my heart rate, but trouble because I really didn't want to keep going. For pity sake, I wasn't even going that fast. How did I get to a place of feeling out of shape, when I have never really stopped running?
Winter training is hard, make no mistake. But I have done it before, and I knew this. I love to run, and I haven't lost the enjoyment of running, but today (ok, the last few days) was one of those days I really felt like quitting. I wanted to cry at the end of the run- and not the "I feel so good about this run" kind of cry. I felt discouraged, defeated, and a far cry from the way I felt in my runs a few months ago.
So I had to remember why I started, Why I love running and wanted to start it in the first place.
I started with a dream, which became a goal.
The dream of reaching a time goal, if you want to say it that way, But really the dream has more to do with becoming a better me.
I started not because I wanted to lose weight, but simply because I feel better physically, emotionally, and spiritually when I run.
I started because I am a goal setter, and running has helped me reach many of those goals.
I started because when I began running several years ago, for the first time in my life, I realized I could do things I'd previously said "I'll never be able to....." And running lent me a whole new perspective.
So, today, when I felt like quitting and throwing in the towel, I had to think and remember why I began.
I am not a quitter.
So, tough runs and all, I will keep going. I'll be up again early tomorrow, probably on the "dread"mill. I may or may not make the time goal I want. But honestly, it's not all about that. I have heard some say that if they can't do it all the way, 100%, it's not worth doing at all. I say, it's not worth giving up. I set the goal. I started the dream. I am going to finish it out, even if it looks different now than when I started. The outcome may be totally different than what I set out for it to be, but that doesn't mean I'm giving it less. In fact, in the midst of the winter, health problems, lost momentum and all, those pathetic treadmill runs may just be 100% of me at that time. So, I am not quitting. I am remembering why I started.
Before you quit, think about why you started.
Smile. ( Or cry if you need to) And keep going with it. It's worth it.