I confess: I am totally a routine oriented person. And when my routine gets thrown off kilter, life feels a little off kilter.
Welcome to my morning :)
I am typically an optimist by nature. But when change brings an adjustment to routines, the pessimist in me crawls out and growls a little at the world around me. I don't like it, but I own it. So, here I sit to write and process it a little. Because when I write, it helps me embrace these changes a little better.
The silly part is, I knew all this change was coming.
Today our life schedule gets rearranged for a while. Classes start back up for me today, and since I am not a procrastinator, I am already sitting with my planner, scheduling my assignments. It's silly to do that at 6 am, but also, with a full work day ahead and a different evening routine, I found that to be the best time to do so. (And they weren't available ahead of time, so today it is.) Michael's work schedule also changes dramatically today. And at the idea of sparing everyone all the details, it just will make life a little more crazy for me and the kids. It'll work itself out in time, but for the start up of this, it's a little hairy.
So, I skipped my workout today (pretty well had to to figure this new routine out) said goodbye to him as he left at 5:30 am and got the kids going on all their duties/preparations. While they are old enough to do life more independently than young children, they still need some prompting. It's funny- when it comes to change, I tend to do pretty well. I think change is good. But, certain changes tend to throw my smile sideways for a bit. Like changes in my routine.
Routines help me. I don't think I realized it until this morning, but routines really keep my anxiety at bay. I know I will get up at 4:30, have my quiet time, get dressed at 5:30, go for my run (or TRX) and be in the shower by 7 and out the door at at work a few minutes early. When I return home, I have a pretty good idea of what to expect.
Today shifts that. My quiet time was interrupted by others being up and moving around, my workout was skipped, the kids needed driven to school because it honestly is too cold for them to walk, and well, you get the picture.
what I am not intending this to be is a post of pure complaining. Take it as you will, but for me, this is an "aha" moment. A way for me to take a deep breath, push out the frustration and move forward with a smile for the rest of the day, rather than growl inwardly. Or rather than let the anxieties rise and be a negative force on my plate.
We will find a new routine, it will just take a few days to get the groove going. Everyone is healthy. God is providing. I'm launching into a new semester of learning. And hey- since this new schedule means me cooking now (because the cook will now be working all kinds of weird and different hours) I get to explore a world of food. That can be fun! More factors play into all of this change, but for today, day 1 of experimenting with a new routine, I can choose to laugh over all the chaos. This girl (ahem... that's me) can really use a bit of a wake up call to shifts in schedules. It happens. Get over it. (So I tell myself as I move into this Monday.)
That being said, the verse that has been playing in my mind this morning is one I plan to hold on to as changes evolve in all of this. Jeremiah 29:11-13 "For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you a hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me and I will listen to you. You will see me and fi nd me when you seek me with all your heart."
A very good reminder for my soul today.
And now it's time to be off to work. Really sitting here and writing wasn't part of my schedule either, but it somehow seemed to fit just right and be one of those necessary moments.
Smile, friends. It's Monday. And Change is good.