Thursday, June 5, 2014

30 Day Journey

Yesterday closed my 30 day running streak.  The 30 days have been quite a ride for me, to be quite honest.  I had no idea when I began this challenge to myself back in May what life would bring for me. Along with learning new things about my determination, I have begun to embrace some greater truths about myself. I have begun a whole new journey in life with a new career.
   The 30 day challenge has definitely been a challenge.

Jimmy Buffet said "Go fast enough to get there, slow enough to see...."  Some runs through these days, I can relate with that quote word for word. Fast enough to do the challenge, slow enough to do some evaluating and growing too...

I have run in the rain, the heat, the humidity, a drop in temperatures, the dark, and the sunlight.I have run mostly alone, but also at times with a couple friends or, thankfully once again, my dog.

 I have fought myself some days and forced my feet out the door, simply because I was determined to make this 30 days happen. Now that 30 days is over, I don't even know if I will stop because I am really enjoying it.

 Along the way, came a dramatic life change for me. While I have often lately been referring to these changes, I write what I am learning in life, and change often brings about some of those strong lessons.
   Any time a major shift in life happens, I miss my mom in a larger way. This time is no different. As I have gone through this and done this challenge and learned things and shifted, I have wished mom were here to talk to about all the changes. Always my biggest supporter,  I always find it hard when she isn't around to share with (or go clothes shopping with!).
   But I know she would be thrilled with the  change.  However, in the emotion of missing mom the last couple of weeks, it is not lost on me that once again, I see a purpose behind my loss of mom. I have struggled to put this into words, but the point has been significant for me. There is always a purpose in everything. We don't always see it, want it or feel it, but God can use anything and everything. Had I not lost mom, I would never have started the 5K in her memory. Had that not begun, I never would have taken a Race Director course. Had I not done that, I would likely not have my now current dream job in the running industry. So you see, mom is still with me.  And while I do not say I am thankful to have walked the road of all the yuckiness of grief, I can see how it has led to this greater purpose for myself. There is always purpose behind pain; can't always see it or understand it, but looking back now, I can find how God has taken that and used it to led me to where I am now.  And mom would like that.  The thought of that has been with me strongly the last week.

  I shared in my last coffee blog that I took from there significant lessons of my worth. During this 30 day challenge, I believe that is a new truth that has taken on growth I did not expect. Those lessons did not come about magically because I was completing a challenge of running every day. However, in my times out running, the truths took on new molds for me.During my runs is my time to think and  process. And I began taking words said to me or things I have done or all the doors God has been opening and viewing them through new lenses. Now I am walking forward, carrying these new realizations with a new sense of determination. Not necessarily because I just did something I have never before done, but  because these things that have been inside me all along, these God given qualities which God has been trying to show me for years exist within me,  have surfaced in new ways.

  The 30 day challenge of running every day was hard to do some days, and yet I loved facing the challenge and completing it. I am most definitely a morning runner. I have finally purchased a pair of running (prescription) sunglasses, which make a large difference to one who needs them to see!
  I have been asked if I will continue the runs and the answer is yes. I will likely put some rest days in there now though, so no more streak per say. I have not chosen a new running challenge just yet.  I will say being engrossed in the running industry now is firing me up for another race, so we will see what is to come.

 Life is all about one day at a time. We never know what will come our way. I had no idea when the challenge began the beautiful ending it would subscribe to become. One day at a time, we can't always see what is ahead (but we don't need to either, God is taking care of those days) but in looking back, we sure can see how far we have come. One day at a time.

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