In a recent blog I follow, it has been said that we should write from the heart and if we have to think too hard about what to write, then it's probably not what we are supposed to be writing anyway.
Sometimes sharing from my heart is vulnerable and hard, and there have been moments I have backed away from it because of fear or because of who might read it. However, I like to be real. And though there are some who get to see or know the "real" me more deeply, it is good to be real here. All this to share that what I am learning in life right now is a lot of things, but one of which is that I am not "just" anybody. Nobody in life is "just" anybody.
There have been many days when I struggle with this deeply.I have a tendency to be pretty insecure. Insecure about my body, insecure about my parenting, insecure about myself as a wife, insecure about who I am as a person... However, in the process of struggling with this, God has brought some really neat affirmations to my life to help confirm to me that I am more than "just" a barista or a mom or a wife or a runner or a woman. I am HIS creation, HIS daughter, HIS gift. He's brought along new friends recently to help confirm this; He's brought along a really neat project at work to help confirm this; He's brought along simple things like words from my children or an embrace from my husband or an email from a friend; He has given me some beautiful moments in creation lately to remind me of His great presence-ranging from the sun shining to a gorgeous snow storm to remind me of His presence. (I'll be the first to say I am very tired of snow at this point in the year, however, in the quietness of the morning the other day when snow had fallen all night, the weight of it on the branches in the pine trees was absolutely breathtaking.) NOBODY is "Just" anything. We all have a significance.
For me, while I thought perhaps at this point in life I'd be doing something totally different, it doesn't mean that what I am doing is insignifcant, though I had to recently really process through this. After all, I "just" make coffee. But, as I said in a previous blog, I have found purpose in polishing with it becoming prayer time.
Ecclessiates says : (3:1-8) "For everything there is a season a time for every activity under Heaven
A time to be born, and a time to die
A time to plant, and a time to harvest.
A time to kill and a time to heal. A time to tear down and a time to build up.
A time to cry and a time to laugh. A time to grieve and a time to dance.
A time to scatter stones and a tmie to gather stones. A time to embrace and a time to turn away.
A time to search and a time to quit searching. A time to keep and a time to throw away.
A time to tear and a time to men. A time to be quiet and a time to speak.
A time to love and a time to hate. A time for war and a time for peace. ....
God has made everything beautiful for its own time. ..."
Every season of life is different, but with each season comes new opportunities. New opportunities to grow in faith. New opportunities to draw closer to Him. New opportunities to touch different people's lives. New opportunities to be touched in ways we never knew could happen. God places people where they are because of who they are. We can be used in any area of life, if we allow God to do so. The case is not different with me.
His timing is perfect. His plan is perfect. And I am not "just" anybody. Man looks at the outward appearance, but God looks at the heart. He sees in me. He knows me. And THAT is what defines me. not a job, not a role, not a weight on the scale, not a style of clothing, not a friendship, not a stage in life. And because those are not the definitions of a person, NOBODY is just anybody.
I am more than just a person who makes coffee.
You are more than one who just cooks.
You are more than a decision maker at the company.
You are more than a mom.
You are more than a pastors wife. You are more than a homeschool teacher and mother.
You are more than what the world defines.
I am His creation, His daughter, His gift. And when I can embrace that, life is beautiful. I am learning this so much more lately, and when I embrace that truth, God shines so brightly in some beautiful ways, as if to say "See, I told you....You are unique and made for me and You are so much more than a title."
Embrace it. You are not "just anybody"!!
One day at a time, I am learning to embrace and live this.