Sunday, August 18, 2013

A chipped mug

When the alarm sounds at 4 am, and I roll out of bed, I am ready for my coffee before I do anything else. Literally. Recently, as I went into the dark kitchen, and pulled out my favorite mug to drink my savory cup of morning joe, I found my favorite mug was chipped.
  It is my favorite mug because it is ceramic, it is 20 oz (and I need my big cup to start the day), it has a large handle, it is colorful and it is happy. It's a great way to start my day. When I found it chipped, I was devastated (ok, that's dramatic; not devastated, but disappointed). My favorite mug was chipped! I was going to have to throw it out.
  As I pondered that, and decided to drink from it one last time, I began to ponder another idea.

I am chipped.
   I have bumps, bruises, knicks, chips, and scars from life's battles.
 I have made mistakes, chosen unwise friends at times, had trust broken, broken trust, and been beat up at times (emotionally, that is).
 I have wrestled with the battles of anxiety and depression and some days I have lost, other days had victories.
    I faced thoughts of wanting life to end head on (and thankfully won that battle).
 I have grieved.
   I am chipped, and my story is evidence of those "chips".
The beautiful part of my story is that even though I am chipped, God still loves me. He didn't throw me out. He sees my knicks and scars and bumps and bruises and chips and embraces me.
  He is strength in my weakness.
     He is the potter and I am the clay, and He doesn't throw away the "clay" just because I am chipped.
  He loves, not because or if I love Him, but because He IS love, and He first loved me.
         He chooses me every time, even if I don't choose Him.
And He never has, nor will He ever, throw me away because of my "chips".

I used to hate that I had all these knicks and chips in me. But now, I look at them differently. I see them in a beautiful way. They make . They tell my story- one of grace, love, learning, forgiveness and compassion. The chips are simply evidence of my journey through life, and a picture of what God can do through even a cracked vessel like myself.
  I drank my morning brew, spent time pondering, reading and praying. I saw myself and others in a new light that day.

  I didn't throw away my favorite mug. I keep my mug and drink from it regularly still. The mug is still my favorite. It is still chipped. It always will be. But that is what makes it even more beautiful.

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