It's just one of those days that I need to share my words. It's not that today(actually since it is so early, I really should say yesterday at this point) is any type of day in particular, but certain things have struck me today-both highs and lows-and so sharing through blog is a lot of times how I express myself. That seems really strange and unpersonal in some ways, I suppose, but it really does help.
Yesterday I woke up at 4 am to do my Monday morning training run. When I woke up, it was pouring down rain. There was no lightning or anything, but it was raining so hard, I almost considered going back to bed. However, I thought to myself-"No, I'm in training. I will wait 30 minutes and see if it slows down." And it did. I actually love to run in the rain-if it's not freezing cold. So I dressed and was out the door at 4:50, headphones in. It turned out to be one of my best runs in a long time. It was so much fun!! I do have to pay attention to how many miles I am logging since I am in training; however, this run in particular I wasn't worrying so much about that, as I was about just enjoying myself. I am glad it was dark-anyone who would've seen me probably would've found me ridiculous looking. I was smiling as I ran. I sang a little bit with my music. I laughed as the rain came down harder on my face (the light rain turned to hard rain as I ran). And I lifted my face into the rain and let it fall on me...it was enjoyable . And it actually was one of my best mile times in a while....however that happened, I' m not quite sure. By the end of my run, I had hit my miles marked for the day, so I slowed down a little and actually splashed through the puddles. It is good to feel carefree once in a while. It is so rare I actually allow myself to be that way (sad, but true). I thanked God as I ran, for the beauty of the rain....and a rare 50 degree day in January (almost unheard of in ohio). I thanked Him for the way to start out the day. It was wonderful to experience His creation so early in the morning.
It was a great way to start out my day.
Really for a Monday, that was a really great start. I can't say the day lasted to be that great as I went along, but I'm getting ahead of myself.
The morning proved to be a fairly busy one for me at work. I wasn't swamped, but I had enough drinks to make-as well as snacks to bag, and my (least) favorite-dishes to polish for a catering event. I was pretty busy. Well, as it neared closer to the lunch hour and more things needed done by that time, I was still feeling pretty happy. After all, I had started out great. And then I went to get the cookies to bag up for lunch. Long story short, I totally dropped 5 or 6 (but who's counting??) trays of the cookies....in front of the boss. Not that I wouldn't have told him anyway. Just, I think that made the circumstance more frustrating for me. I like my boss a lot. But it was one of those moments I would rather have never experienced. Really it boiled down to me being in a hurry and not taking the time to be careful. Oh, I learned my lesson. I humbly apologized, as there was really nothing else I could do. I took the remaining 4 trays (which don't go very far with as many employees as work there) to put together for the lunch hour. I told Nellie-the baker of the cookies-who really just laughed out loud and gave me a hug-and I moved along in my day. I am telling this story not because it was the most horrible experience really (although I hope to never have it happen again), but really just because it goes with how I am learning and growing. It's not to say I will be able to do this every day, but instead of crying about this event-as I typically would many times-I knew there was nothing I could do except accept it and move on. It's not to say I can do that every time, but I am sure trying. It was a God moment. One of not beating myself up, but of hearing His voice and remembering how I'd experienced Him in my run that day, and hearing His voice in the moment....there are much bigger things than dropped cookies.
I also thought of mom a lot through my day. Some days I think of her more than others-though every day really she is in my heart and mind. I thought a lot about her yesterday. I thought about how It would be a day I would've loved to share with her. It would've been a day I would call her and laugh about my puddle jumping and likely cry about the cookies. I thought of her because a person who was pretty strongly in my life during the time she was sick and then passed away, but who hasn't been as much since, appeared in a funny way that day ( through a card of sorts), and it made me remember. I thought of her because I could hear her voice speaking what she would've said had we been face to face having the conversation about the run and the cookies and such. I missed her a lot through those thoughts. There were a lot of random moments in the day for me. A lot of times where I stopped and saw God.Where I stopped and heard mom.
I miss her some days more than others-though I am always missing her. Monday was one of those days. It was the random things-the moments when I'm not expecting to feel that pang of missing her-that catch me most off guard. Monday was one of those days.
This morning's run was another good one. I did a speed workout which I really don't enjoy. But today it felt pretty good. And as I ran , a song in particular played that struck me strongly today.The words of the chorus are:
There is no one one like our God
There is no one like our God
Yes there is no one like You, God.....
Greater things are yet to come
Greater things are still to be done in this city
When glory shines from hearts and lives
with praise for you and love for you in this city
Greater things have yet to come
and greater things have still to be done in this city
Greater things have yet to come and greater things have still to be done here.....
Mom isn't here. But I can hear her still often-in those random moments sometime that I expect least. But there are still greater things to be done. And there truly is no on like our God. And I have yet things to do in this city. Like Relay for Life. Like bag cookies (LOL). Like ....who knows what? Only God. As I begin my day today and even have an event tonight for Relay for Life....I'll see what greater things He may have to come....for me. And I'll continue to look for Him (and for my mom) in the little things. And I will try to remember that there are greater things to come, hard as that is some days. One day at a time.