Christmas thoughts and Abundant Life

The sun is streaming through the windows, and I walked outside without a coat today. It is a very rare day in December. Many are missing the snow falling, but I, for one, am enjoying the sunshine. In Ohio, that is rare to come by in the winter time.

 It is Christmas Eve. The memories swirl around me and hug me tight as I reflect on this year, and begin to think about the upcoming one ahead. I'm a natural deep-thinker, but this time of year always brings it more strongly through my thought process. As the year comes to a close, there will be more words to share on that. Today I reflect on other thoughts.

 Grief is a funny thing. It comes and goes and sneaks in where unexpected. This year, it has caught me off guard. It's been nearly 9 years since Mom passed away. This year, though, the Christmas season has been hard for me. Perhaps it has to do with wishing she could sit across the table from me and share a cup of coffee and celebrate the accomplishments of this year. Maybe it is in part due to the fact that my daughter is going through her Senior year of high school and a list of "lasts" are occurring, drawing upon a deep desire to have my mom to share these moments together and also needing sage advice from my wise mom. It could be the fact that this is the first year I did not bake our traditional cookie, my way of carrying on my mom through the holidays. However, time did not allow for that.... and the one thing I did try to make that she always did at the Christmas season, did not turn out stellar (ok, it did not turn out well AT ALL!) and I could not call her to ask her what I'd done or how to fix it....

 Whatever the case may be, I find myself missing her deeply this year. Grief is a funny thing.

 However, the sun shining through my living room window today reminds me of the hope that shined through my mom and (can) shine through me as well. It is a hope that exists because of the Christmas season itself. We place so much focus on gifts, decorating, baking, parties and festivities, that it can become easy to get overwhelmed with sadness of missing those not present and/or missing the point of the hope that we have EVERY DAY because of one day we celebrate in December.

 Today, in lieu of not being at work, I took some time to reflect on the Christmas story. I've grown up reading this story, hearing it, knowing it, even acting it out as my dad would read it Christmas Eve. So it always amazes me when new aspects jump out and bring new truths to mind.
 I've spent some time this year learning about my worth in Jesus Christ, which has helped shape me into a stronger person. Nonetheless, a part of me has always resonated with the underdogs in life. Jesus was often drawn to the underdogs, those people of society that others often rejected. Those people tell a story to me that sits deep in my soul. Today I reflected a lot on the Shepherds in the story of His birth.
 
  Shepherds were not a glorified group of people in the Bible times. I am far from being a scholar, so I am not going to launch into backgrounds or theology. But the fields were dirty, the hours were long, and the company was animals and nature. It was a lonely job, if I had to guess. I'm sure the pay was very minimal as well. However, the angels chose to appear to the Shepherds to tell them of the Savior's birth. I am sure that was no mistake. It foreshadowed so many things. In reading about this, and thinking on the shepherds, my mind got drawn to the book of John, where Jesus is the Good Shepherd. And in John 10:10 He says that the thief comes to steal and destroy, but He came to give life, and that we may have it to the fullest.

 I allow the thief to steal my joy at times. But He has come that I may always have joy. Even in the midst of struggles. Even in the midst of grief filled days 9 years later. Even in the midst of a not so successful baking. Even in the midst of every single moment of every single day. He came to us as a baby, which we celebrate at Christmas, and gave us the gift of abundant life to have forever.

 I'm so glad the the angels appeared to the shepherds, a group in society not so accepted. I am so thankful that He chose to love me, in spite of my insecurities and struggles.  I am also so glad that He was sent to us so many years ago so that today we can have continued abundant joy.