Growth in 2018

"Without continual growth and progress, such words as improvement, achievement, and success have no meaning."  Benjamin Franklin


 If I had to sum up this year in one word it would be: Growth.

 I have not written in this space for some time now, and as I have been reflecting the last several days, I have wanted to share about my experiences this year. Today, I will sum up some of those into one blog for you. But, because I am quite the wordy person when I process, I will break it down over the next few days into categories.

 2018 has been a year of change. Change forces reflection and growth. We can't always see it in the moment, but looking back, we can find it if we take time to reflect.

In my job, I experienced many changes - a new boss, some coworkers leaving, new ones coming on and a promotion for myself as well.

My kids are growing up, with my daughter working now and actively taking horse lessons and going out with friends. (And sometimes driving.) My son joined ROTC at school and is growing in his own self as well. I love that these things are happening. It's not to say that change is bad... it is not. But it does bring growth. Being a mom of teenagers is a challenge. Letting go and allowing the balance of independence mixed with still being a firm parent is not easily done, and I am learning through my own mistakes at times.


 My education continues to move forward and that reshapes my thinking at times; it challenges me mentally many days, but it also pushes me to learn my own views more in depth. Through the education, I continue to grow in many ways. I love talking about what I am learning - the challenges of it, the excitement of it and even the moments I do not like ( Biology was such a class for me... thank goodness that is over!) I have felt beat up by the classes at times and have also found great satisfaction in them. The classes I have taken have taught me so much... and also helped me see  how much I don't know.

 Fitness... well, my education trumped my fitness many days of this year. It remains a priority for me, but often times it had to take the back seat to either sleep or classes because those 2 things were a greater priority. I never abandoned my fitness, I just had to take it down a notch, which was not easy for me and leaves me thirsty with goals to improve in 2019. However, shifting this area of life also taught me many lessons. This is why I will dedicate separate blogs to each of these categories over the next few days.

 I began my year by choosing the word "Faith" as my word for the year, having no idea how my faith would shape me. I can't say I abided in it all the time, nor did I let it guide me always. But I do know I held on to it for dear life when the changes felt unbearable or the waves of depression or anxiety threatened to be too much for me. Change brings growth, growth reshapes faith in all new ways. I had zero idea beginning this year what changes were going to be part of my story; looking back over the year, I am thankful for them. They exhausted me at times, but I am a stronger and better person for them. As the song says "On Christ the solid rock I stand, all other ground is sinking sand..."

The "category" of work, well... this area may be one which taught me the hardest and best lessons this year. At the beginning of 2018, I actually spent time working 2 jobs. I worked during the week at the marathon office as normal, and on the weekends, I worked in a home for dementia residents. Those beautiful old people taught me many lessons. Lessons which can't be written down, but are ones to be lived. Those people, who so much of society (and even their own families) disregard, taught me love and laughter.
 Along with that job and lessons learned, came the hundreds of lessons I incurred with the changes that took place in my full time job. The changes have had challenges, but through it all I have discovered many new qualities of myself. I look forward to sharing this more.

 I traveled to Colombia two times; I had the incredible opportunity to serve as a translator here in the States for a week in October; I ran a few races and saw a few places; I made new friends, which also helped shape growth; I laughed a lot but I probably cried more. I stood up to bullies. I gave up some desires only to watch God give them to me in different ways. This year has been exhausting at times and exhilirating in others.

 As I began the word with the year "Faith", I feel I may have done an injustice to its definition. But faith is truly always growing, and that is what this year has been about for me. As I share more in depth, you may understand more. I want to continue to embrace this word every day, to bring more justice to the One in whom I place my faith.

 In the beginning of the blog, I used a quote by Benjamin Franklin. "Without continual growth and progress, such words as improvement, achievment, and success have no meaning."
  Through the growth I experienced this year, I for sure found progress in myself, I feel improvement in my development, and I have seen more successes. None of those would have been possible without the challenges.
 2018 was a hard year in many ways, mostly unseen and unknown to most, and yet by far the year in which I have learned to embrace who I am in all new ways and continue to progress and move forward.